This Bigass Barbie is officially Banded!!!!

Yesterday was the day! I would have posted last night, but I was higher than a hippie in a helicopter on all those pain meds, and I was afraid it wouldn't make any sense. So here is how it all went down:

We arrived at the hospital at 5:30 am. I was checked in and called back by 6. They did the usual...ask me the same questions they had already asked me 5,643,278 times. Made me strip nakey and put on designer gown and stockings.

They had a hard time getting the IV in. I hate it when the nurse doesn't want to listen to me. I told her that she wouldn't be able to do it on the left side...anywhere. She said "oh sure we can, you have great veins over here and we don't like to do it on your right side since you are right handed." So, three failed attempts later (kept blowing my veins) I wanted to scream "Look twatwaffle, I told you to start on the right side!" Finally, another nurse came in and got it in right away.

By 7:30 they came in and said I was getting something to relax me. It did more than relax me, it knocked my ass out! I remember The Rockstar kissing me and then nothing else until I woke up in recovery. I do, however, remember hurting like hell when I woke up. I felt like I couldn't catch my breath good and I felt like they left the scapel dug in my abdominal area on the left side. The nurse said don't worry I will take care of that for you...and she did...she hooked a sista up with hella good drugs. I don't know what she gave me, but that pain went right away.

I had heard a lot of people say that they had really chapped lips when they came out. I took my Bonne Bell Strawberry and Vanilla lip balm with me. I caked it on just before they took me to the O.R. and I didn't have chapped lips at all. I also didn't feel dried out...they had this mask on me that sprayed a fine cool mist, so that was all good.

By noon I had peed 3 times and had tolerated liquid several times, so they said I was ready to go if I wanted. Just before they took the IV out they shot me up with Morphine, Zofran, and made me drink some liquid Lorabtab. Let's just say I don't remember much of the hour drive home.

We got home and The Rockstar put me to bed. He took everything the doctor said very literally...he was waking me up every 30 minutes to drink 2 oz...and yes he had it measured in Dixie cups. He was forcing me to take pain meds every 4 hours...finally when I woke up for good this morning I said "Enough with the pain meds!" I have tolerated liquids with no problem and had some jello and a little chicken broth. I am not really hungry and don't really feel like having anything but water and juice.

All in all, it wasn't too bad. I do feel like Mike Tyson punched me in stomach, but I know that will get better each day.